Oops, I kept misspelling "possibilities" but it coulda been worse.
We've had a conversation or two over time here centering on what could be possible alternatives to the three current powerlifts, according to our own views.
Well here's a chance, via the comments, to state your opinion.
Let me be frank before you become earnest . . .
the lack of outside audience interest in powerlifting is understandable. Hey, it's not much to watch really, not as a sport compared to the ones that actually have action involved other than three movements. There's only one person involved at a time, there's no body contact with opponents, there's no countering the other contestants moves because there aren't any moves. Fucking yawn. Put simply . . .
Powerlifting is less than checkers,
Boxing is chess with stitches.
Anyhow . . .
I'll go first with a pressing movement.
And I'll make an ass of myself so it's easier for you to express your views.
You can yank chain, maybe be the "serious" individual, do what the fuck you like down there.
In my view, once the "organizers" and the memory-obsessed with a data collection fetish enter in to any endeavor . . . it's fucked. The whole thing of lifting may have been ruined repeatedly by idiots who take it seriously. Fortunately, in my view again, there's ways out of it. Unfortunately they entail killing everyone and starting anew. Aw shucks!
Okay, here we have a floor press of sorts (aren't they all equally absurd) being performed by a guy named Ivan who billed himself as the strongest man in the world. Yes, yet another.
There may be issues with judging owing to the weight of the assistants, some may not be natty and dance rather rapidly with heavier steps than their truly natural counterparts.
In effect what we have here is an 11-person contested event that shows strength of the man pressing combined with the technical finesse of the upper entrants out to set records, set the world right and make everyone happy they're breathing the repetitive air of Earth.
Yip!
I give you the one-board floor press
while five couples
dance a mid-tempo two-step
on top.
Way, WAY more exciting than any bench press comp.
Feel free to comment and add your own ideas for possible ways to
improve on the three currently popular and contested power-lifts.
Is that a vintage leopard-skin bench shirt Ivan has on?
Two-ply, single strap.
Use CODE: SABU
and save on one.
You do realize there's lifting comps in the animal kingdom, right?
I've always loved Goerner's assessment on true strength which is how much you can pick up, how much you can walk around with and how much you can put overhead. So, for my 3 lifts I would do the one arm barbell deadlift done in Goerner's fashion with the bar lifted in front of the body and not straddled between the legs as the Jefferson version is performed. Also, I'd require that the lifter has to do each arm and not just using their strongest arm so in that way we can see how they perform with their non dominant hand. Also, if they fail to lift with their non dominant hand then it wouldn't pass altogether.
ReplyDeleteNext, I'd do the one arm strict dumbbell clean and press with the lifter having to do both arms as I stated above with the one arm barbell deadlift. For the third lift I'd do the farmer's walk with individual log handles because it's way harder with your grip and balance compared to the single frame. I'd also require that the lifts have to be done with an overhand grip and no hook grip to truly test the grip strength.
Now having said all this, I'd love to include probably 100 events in a contest that would cover a huge variety of lifts in all different manners of lifting. Front squats done from a dead stop at the very bottom position, zercher squats also done the same way but all the way from the floor, several feats of grip strength besides the main 3 l listed such as single finger lifting, pinch block, leverage bar twists and holds, strict reverse barbell curl & regular strict barbell curl, strict weighted pullups done in a military fashion with a hard grip where the hands are facing forward away from you and at a proper hanging height where your feet clear the ground and you can't use momentum from your legs.
Another thing I would include is thick bar variations of all the lifts I mentioned with 2.5 & 3 inch diameters. There's so many more I could list but these were just off the top of my head at the moment. Also, strict seated pressing without a back rest and same for seated behind the neck press.
Hey, Jeff . . . always good to hear from ya!
DeleteHow much you can pick up,
How much you can waltz around with, and
How much you can put overhead.
I enjoyed your take on varied strength tests. The whole idea of having many tests contested is my view too. But contests would go on from sunup to sunup and never end . . . so . . . my take is to have single-test comps on pretty much any sort of lifting heavy things, be they barbell, dumbbell, sandbag carry, one finger grip tests, whatever . . . small time comps in some shed with no coverage, and a good time was had by all.
WTF is up with this stuff anyhow? Why do humans insist on being "known" for doing things they spend time and energy on? What's the big deal with backpats and all that bullshit? I have no clue and make a point of staying with that view.
But yeah, one-lift, one-test comps would be great in my eyes. And the variety might solve the inherent narcoleptic effect of watching endless fucks squat/bench/dead, or snatch/C&J while their friends cheer and yell and judges eat cold hot dogs and drink stale soda as the day turns to night which and become sunup again.
Ah, hell . . . my perception of pretty much any human action, mental or physical is loopy anyhow.
Would not have it any other way!
Long ago, before we "shrunk" the planet with rapid travel that takes place while we sit on our stinking asses, people would make long, hard trips (psilocybin-sex?) to get to gatherings of any sort. You had to really WANT to get there and what in heck do I know. Burn it all down, there's little of worth on Earth once the lies and convenient mass-illusions get stripped off. Honestly, I have no idea what I'm talking about and that's why I fit in so well on social media.
DeleteTangential as always and I like it that way. Here in Vancouver we'll be "hosting" the soccer cunts with their high salaries and silly-ass uniforms. No one asked the people who live here who as usual wind up paying for it. Fucking fat-wallet tourist pigs porking their way around town like money means anything.
DeleteFIFA's basically a criminal outfit based on laundering money and misdirecting funds to the top brass. Oh golly, ain't organized sport on a huge scale grand?
It's this summer, so there'll be the same roundup of homeless folks and the usual paperboard false-front repair of "unsightly" areas so sports-tourists can watch a ball get booted around. Money put to good use!
Tourists sicken me. Go back home, sit in your stinkin' house and shut the fuck up. It's taken for granted they'll be treated like kings; however, on a side note I also don't like . . . they'll be keeping the folders, crazies and homeless people off the trains for the duration of this wee ball-kicking bozo-fest that only the moneyed can view. Now there'll be no one interesting on transit, and plodding bore-heads from various countries and continents, all content and such, will be the main source of joke/laugh material. A limited lot to say the least.
DeleteActually, it should be a bit of fun here and there. I'm just doing schtick as an angry guy. Are there still pickpockets in this brave new digital age? Do people carry wallets anymore or is it all on their little phone? Pickpockets from all round the world will also be arriving this summer. Yes! I'm gonna try to spot some on the trains.
Delete"Blogs serve as personal diaries, niche topic hubs, and business marketing tools."
DeleteOkay! Two outta three ain't bad.
WWRRS . . . What would Rex Reed Say?
Delete